Home is where you make it

My home is where my family is but questions brought to me tonight bring thoughts and memories of my Flint home that make tears fall.  I am thankful to be able to make my home for the next two years in a bigger and newer house but as I finish unpacking I miss more and more the ample storage of my old home.  My kitchen here may be newer but I miss my bigger and more powerful appliances.  The dishwasher in Flint may have leaked a little but it held much more and it got my dishes clean!  And my microwave popped popcorn in 2 minutes not 5-61/2 .  I miss the things we didn't get around to changing like painting and new carpet for the living room and under the cabinet lighting in the kitchen.  As it is it would have been wasted money so I'm glad we didn't spend it.

As spring gives us tiny glimpses of what's to come I miss my big backyard and large garden and the plans I had for both.  There was to be a strawberry patch and raspberry bushes.  Both things we never had the money to put in the way we wanted to.  My herb garden was just at the beginning stages of coming together.  Erin built it last summer and I would have started filling it this spring.  I will miss the deck and the fire pit, and boy I wish we had a shed here.  I will not be canning homegrown veggies this summer because I have no place to grow them.  I do not like the work of planting and harvesting and canning but I love the feel of feeding my family food grown of our own time and sweat.  Fortunately we did think to bring my Mother's Day lily from a few years ago.  Erin dug it up for me and it tagged along for the ride.

Leaving the place so quickly left little time to prepare mentally.  The last week I shed many tears doing mundane things like wiping out cupboards and vacuuming the basement.  Both things I had to do again when I moved here.  Upon viewing this house it was not evident how dirty it was.  I'm still finding spots on walls that need a good wiping. 

I will not again host a family gathering in our multi-purpose basement.  I will not stay up late putting together another birthday cake in my perfectly sized kitchen (enough counter space for multiple projects but not too much floor to clean).  I will not again fill the basement pantry full of bargain buys from doubling my coupons at Kroger.  I don't even have space now to stock up that well. 

I will make new memories and new routines in a nice new to us house.  I will host out of town guests in a guestroom rather than on an air mattress in the basement.  I will watch my children ride their bikes and scooters around a quiet cul-de-sac.  I will build a new life in a new place and try not to dwell on what is left behind.

The last two plus years have been hard ending with an abrupt departure from the life we knew and were comfortable with.  We will pick ourselves up, dust ourselves off, and look to a bright new Minnesota future.  But, if the opportunity comes, watch out Michigan, I'll be pushing hard for a return of the Haven's.